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Struggling with Addiction and Alcoholism

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It would be really nice to have a glass of wine with dinner. I miss having cocktails with friends, and holidays, like Halloween, make me miss letting loose and "having fun." Those are no longer privileges of mine though, unfortunately. You see, I am bodily and mentally different from others. I have a genetic predisposition (nature), plus my environment throughout life has contributed (nurture) - whatever, it's who I am.  I respond to alcohol different from my fellows; I'm essentially allergic, except instead of it being like an allergy to strawberries, for instance, I'm judged harshly for it - and it can wreck havoc on not only my life, but my families as well when/if I choose to consume it. Also - I have a mind that prioritizes alcohol over basic living needs for survival, and a body that craves it. Do people who are allergic to strawberries have strong cravings and a mental obsession for them? I'm not sure, but I doubt when people who are allergic to stra